4 Simple Steps to Get Unstuck in Your Business

You might know the feeling…we have the urgency to go somewhere but are pretty much sitting still; feeling unmotivated, overwhelmed, and TIRED. We are tired of the hustle, tired of feeling behind, tired of watching others success (not that you're not happy for them, but why can't we pull it all together ourselves and finally FEEL the success we think is at our fingertips?!), tired of not getting clients and selling ANYTHING, tired of paying for a coach or programs or the infrastructure to run our business (seeing little results), TIRED OF BEING TIRED.

Anyone here?

And if you are, you might know what I am going to say next. This experiencing is not exclusive to just you, many of us feel the same sentiments and emotional hiccups and discouragement.  Sometimes, I would love to conduct a study to assess how entrepreneurs perceive and emotionally cope with being a self-starter. I would also be excited explore the impact of the constant messages that fill our feeds of all the ‘success’ we see around us. Not that watching others success is a ‘bad’ thing, but not only is not always based in reality or giving the full picture of a situation, but it may also increase the likelihood of us fueling ourselves with thoughts and self-comparison where we are spinning and never doing enough and never where we want to be (though we have those sprinkles of inspiration...just enough to keep us going and dreaming and charging forward!!!!!).

Just like important topics in our culture is sometimes taboo, I feel like our acknowledgement and sharing of STRUGGLE is sometimes invisible...we can share our struggle, but it must be framed in a specific way...the ugly, overwhelm that is feels like it gets put away to be socially-acceptable-framed.

So what if you are someone is in the 'entrepreneur darkness'...always watching everyone pass on by and feeling all those 'feelings' about where you are? Here are 4 things to explore when you are looking to get unstuck in your business.

1. CLARITY...is there any part of you that is unsure about what you are doing, selling or sharing, we will not be able to represent our authentic selves to others, and they will not connect with us!!! This can represent some deeper (but completely do-able!!!) work; who we are and how this is manifested in our business, and how our business is a manifestation of OURSELVES. More clarity can significantly impact how and what we share, and how others will perceive YOU/your business!

2. OVERWHELM...can we start untangling the overwhelm that we might be experiencing?  That is, what pieces are playing into the overwhelm and how can we start to identify them? Becoming aware of what these pieces are is massively important (is it the clarity, is it being unsure of ourselves, are there fears about getting out there or around success/failure, etc), so we can start to work through and with them.

3. SEASONS...can we acknowledge and give ourselves permission to embrace and be within our current Season?  Sometimes we might actually be doing all we can do but run against other obstacles; we can't find more time between juggling home and kids and our other jobs, we might have health issues we can't control, we might be taking care of other family members, we might have other special circumstances that others may not realize or know the heaviness that it can feel. Friend, you are in a Season and we need to both embrace and see what we can do within our Season. Sometimes chatting about this with someone else can give a balanced perspective because holding all of this on our own is HARD. See if there is any wiggle room and move within it. If you feel as though you are completely boxed in, maybe it is time to take a breather to get energy and LIFE back. Acknowledging and exploring this with someone can be helpful!!!

4. INSULATION...being a part of an online culture can be amazing and fun AND it can prey into our negative thoughts about ourselves. We may feel like we are behind because we are paying attention to everyone else who is 'ahead'.  How can you pull the focus back on YOU and YOUR AUTHENTIC MESSAGING and your mission, and use this to drive you! This may require more boundaries with engaging online, or this may require something I call a 'pop culture purge', an action where we identify the negative triggers and accounts and hide them for awhile-- maybe not forever but until we gain our own grounding! What are some things to might be able to do today to start more self-focus and less over-focus?

There are honestly many other reasons we can feel like we are discouraged and 'stuck in the slow lane' in our business (or life)...would you have any to add? If you have been through this and feel like you have a helpful tip, what would you share with others who do feel this way??? (And side note...we ALL feel waves of this at different times!!!)! 💛

And if you are in the middle of this, please reach out - THIS IS WHAT I CAN HELP WITH through my monthly business mentorship coaching!!! Please use this link to schedule a free consultation chat...I would be honored to support and help you in transforming from thinking about to BECOMING. 💛

Sending hugs and encouragement!!!

-Ariane

3 Harmful Publicity Myths You Need to Avoid

The use of publicity and getting into the media are some of the best (and cheapest) ways to build your business, especially as our world has trended to online publishing and information sharing. The variety of places that you are able to gain positive brand exposure continues to grow making the possibilities endless. This is really exciting for business owners looking to get out there and grow their businesses with ease, but there are definitely some publicity myths that may prevent you from showing up with the most authentic version of yourself (or showing up at all!). Through my work with entrepreneurs looking to build their online portfolio and get media coverage, I have heard repeating themes in regards to the perception of what getting into the media really means. I will be sharing the top 3 myths as well as the truths!

Myth 1:  You have to be an extrovert or enjoy attention to be seen in the media.

Ok, let’s de-bunk this one right away.  While it may appear online as though those who have super loud voices and seem to relish the spotlight are often seen in the media, the reality is that there are so many other ways for you and your business to be seen. Getting quoted in an online publication can be a great way to be seen without feeling as though you are front and center as you would be in a video. You can still have a quiet presence while making a powerful statement, adding to your business credibility. There is never a one size fits all approach to media and publicity, rather, your goals, style, strengths and preferences can be accounted for, and you get to decide on what types of media and publicity will work for you in a comfortable way.

It is also important to note that your past experiences and family history can contribute to the story line we may tell ourselves about being seen or engaging in what we may deem as ‘attention-seeking’ behavior, such as publicity and online sharing.  We may have been a part of a system where we were told to be humble always, and as such, bringing attention to accomplishments or things we have done were frowned upon. It may be helpful to do a quick self-reflection to examine if some of these self-beliefs exist, and if so, how they might be influencing our willingness to engage in media and publicity. If it feels like your story line sounds like the one I mentioned above (“being humble is important and if you boldly share about yourself or your business, you are being arrogant”), it may be helpful to do some re framing of intentions so we can freely and beautifully share our gifts to have intentional and greater impact!

Myth 2:  Only being in a well known magazine or media story qualifies as legitimate PR.

When I work with entrepreneurs in getting into the media, one of the first things we discuss are publicity goals.  I LOVE when people dream big and share their biggest and most ultimate aspirations. And, there also needs to be some education about how publicity works.  A major magazine or news organization is not going to simply pluck out someone without any examples of work or online repertoire as a guest expert for their segment or column. Instead, they are going to want to hear about this person from a variety of sources, including pieces that they have done in the past to show what they are capable of. What this means is that there needs to be a solid publicity foundation. That is, there needs to be an intentional building of media exposure that show the depth of work, knowledge, and expertise.

What this means for my clients is that there is no media project too small, and often, this is where we need to start.  Examples of starting points might include guest blogging, being a guest on a podcast, being a source or contributor to a magazine, or serving as a free guest speaker at a lunch and learn.  These are ALL very important activities that are needed to build depth and breadth of media coverage. And interestingly, these are all things that an entrepreneur is capable of doing ON THEIR OWN without the need of a publicist (in fact, this is exactly what I teach in my Master the Media Live Masterclass!)!!!  All of these foundational activities will help lend greater credibility to bigger things, including being a paid guest speaking at a Live Event, gaining sponsorship on a blog, getting a featured article or column in a magazine, or even speaking on the news or on camera. Media begets more media, and everyone needs to start somewhere!  Hopefully this elicits hope that you are completely capable of getting into the media and provides a landscape for what it might look like when you get started!

Myth 3:  I need to hire a publicity or media person to help me get more business exposure.

This is probably one of the biggest myths I hear about when I speak with entrepreneurs. They think they need to hire someone (usually $$$) to help them be seen in bigger and bolder ways.  And while YES, a PR person can be vital, I often think the baseline foundational activities needs to be met first. Translation: If you are a beginning entrepreneur or just beginning to understand how media can help you and want to get into the media, you are capable of doing this on your own!  If you have no idea where to start, I would recommend my Master the Media Live Training to help you understand what you can do for yourself (there are so many ways to leverage the media for your business!), but overall, know that you absolutely do not need to hire a PR whiz to help you gain publicity.

We would love to have you join us for our Master The Media Training where you will learn EXACTLY the tools you need to start being seen in ways that fit your goals and style without spending extra $ on this aspect of your business!

We have amazing and special tools + bonuses you can use to skyrocket your visibility + gain comfort in getting out there in the media including a recorded interview with a writer from Self Magazine and Glamour, who shares the bones of a good pitch and what you need to do to have your pitch stand out to writers. I also include an Aspiration Journal and Swipe Files for pitching, so you don’t have to second guess yourself or spend excessive time worry about what to say in a pitch!

I GOT YOU and CAN’T WAIT FOR YOU TO SUCCEED!!!

Do you have any myths you have experienced or heard about? I would love to hear from you!

Top 3 Tips for Choosing a Life Coach Training Program

Life Coaching and the coaching industry in general is one of the fastest growing industries. In the U.S. the estimated market value for personal coaching was $955 million in 2015 and $1.02 billion in 2016, and this number is expected to continue to rise with a 6.7% yearly growth rate from 2016 to 2022. There is no better time to investigate coaching as a legitimate profession.

While you may have knowledge about the growing trend of coaches and have had whispers of wanting to pursue this profession, there may have been hesitations for number of reasons. Potential students I have spoken with have expressed their desire to make a difference and contribute to positive change in others, but didn’t feel confident in their ability to coach; they felt confused how they would do coaching and what this would look like for them. Other students have said they didn’t know what their niche would be, and felt uneasy imagining themselves immersed in coaching when they were unsure about what they would be focused on the coaching sessions and how they would specifically positive influence their client. And finally, some potential students have shared their fears about investing in themselves when they have many other important obligations and roles in their lives, including being a Mom and having a ‘day’ job.

Maybe you see yourself in some of these thoughts and wonder how coaching might be integrated with you, friend, but maybe you also feel the need to at least EXPLORE what you would need to do to feel informed about the coaching industry and what getting trained in this area would entail. I am going to provide a list of my Top 3 Tips here for what YOU should be looking for in potential coaching programs to help you re-calibrate your thoughts and feel grounded with whatever decision you decide is right at the current time.

1. Know you have options and there will be a ‘right’ program for you.

There are MANY coach training programs out there and while this is amazing to have so many choices, I think it can also be a little overwhelming! While you are investigating programs, you should be looking for reference to the ICF, or International Coaching Federation. The training program should either be accredited by the ICF, or have program standards aligned with the standards set forth by the ICF. The ICF is considered the ‘gold standard’ of coaching, and as such, it speaks to the program validity if their training is aligned with this organization.

2. Integrity is KEY.

With the onset of online ‘everything’, it can be easy to portray something with adorable branding pictures, inspiring graphics, and amazing copy. Even though our connection and energy that we experience landing on a website of a training program is important, we need to know that the individuals educating us are well-trained in the areas that they will be teaching you. When you land on a coach training website, it should be READILY AVAILABLE who the instructors are and what their credentials are. It does not cut it to have ‘life experience’ or someone who has ‘learned through their own mishaps’; in training future coaches, educators must have an appropriate background in specific training in a helping profession.

3. Schedule a conversation to further determine fit and vibe.

I recommend making a list of about 3 programs that feel like a good fit, and then I would invite you to schedule a conversation with someone on their program team to further refine your choices. On this phone call, there should be no pressure to make a decision in the moment (or some type of instant sales pitch that if you purchase on the phone, you save more money: this would be a red flag and no-go), rather, the person on the program training team should be operating in your best interest and helping you make the best decision for your training goals and current needs. And, the conversation should be viewed as an extension of the program. How you feel on the phone with the person might be a reflection of how you might feel in the program. Did they respond to you warmly, did they answer all your questions, did they seem in a hurry, did they uphold the boundaries of the phone call length, etc. These are all meaningful pieces of information that can help you make a decision.

Overall, researching and finding a life coach training program should be an exciting time and adventure!!! There are so many wonderful options depending on a students’ style, vibe, personality, goals, and budget!

Know you have time to make a decision, and that the coaching program should have your best interest and heart in mind. YOU ARE RIGHT ON TIME.

Is there something that you felt was important in researching a program that wasn’t listed here? If so, please reach out…we would love to hear from you!

Click Here if you would like to learn more about the

Conscious Coaching Collective Certified Life Coaching Program.

{I CHOOSE COURAGE}

The less-than thoughts, the comparison to other (stylish-without-trying) Moms on Instagram, the experience that we don’t feel good in our bodies and want to change our physical appearance, the pressure that we put on ourselves to be a successful Coach/Entrepreneur but feel overwhelmed because we have tried so much (and feel exhausted), the constant nagging feeling that we are letting our families and our kids down when we open our computer or feel distracted by how we want to create our success, yet to create success we need time and we feel guilty for spending time away from those that need us to claim it for ourselves. Our thoughts create a holding pattern of stagnancy, defeat, frustration, and overwhelm. The heaviness of expectation and pressure are felt every day AND we know that we are meant for more and CAN DO MORE. If you finding yourself sitting with some of these thoughts, here are some shifts to help buffer some of this experiencing and lend some perspective to what you might be going through.

1. Know you are not alone.

These thoughts that you are having are not a 'you' problem specifically, but rather, a cultural problem where we have become fueled by pretending and impressing. Despite what you think you see with the pretty professional pictures and styled whatever (cue the laid back Mom looking absolutely adorable with her happy kids, all styled in clothes that are not matched, but coordinated in an eclectic way), a picture is just a snapshot of 1 millisecond of time that conveys NOTHING about a true experience. It is meant to tell a story (which it does!), but the story that we understand is directly influence BY THE LENS IN WHICH WE SEE OURSELVES.

2. Try to be mindful of sources and triggers of these feelings.  

Try to be in tune with how you are feeling and what you are thinking when you are exposed to different social media sources. For example, as you view a social media account, a specific FB group page, or within your feed in general, what do you notice about how you are feeling during this process? Try to view these sources as informative and guide you toward what you need or want from your life.

3. Engage in things and people and social media that SERVES you.

This is where I do something called a Pop Culture Purge, that is, I encourage an you to unsubscribe and eliminate those things and people that bring you down, and instead, fill yourself with sources that ENERGIZE and bring goodness and joy to you life! We are not simply ‘filling’ your life, we are engaging in sources that are FULFILLING.

4. Maintain a KIND AND GENEROUS perspective to yourself.

Self care doesn't just mean getting a massage or pedicure; it means treating ourselves with the SAME COMPASSION we treat others (even if we tell ourselves that we wish we had more patience, that we had to use our Mom Hulk voice, or a recent business idea didn't take off like we had wanted). How can you offer yourselves some grace to yourself each day through your thoughts and words directed inward?

Consider this your invitation today to see yourself as MORE. You will CHOOSE COURAGE and honor and appreciate ALL the parts of ourselves.  

You deserve it, friend.

Sending hugs + Encouragement,

Ariane

{THE SCIENCE BEHIND STANDING OUT}

Outside of my role with the Conscious Coaching Collective, I have worked as a Psychology Professor and Adjunct Faculty for many years. Interestingly, I have found many ways to explain what we do today in the online biz world using the SAME research and facts from models and theories that explain various phenomenon in psychology.

One of the first variables entrepreneurs mention as being helpful to their business is their ability to BE MEMORABLE. That is, when a potential clients needs a specific type of services and support, we want to be the ones thought of first as someone who can fill this need and help them out! The Information Processing Model of Memory shares how we move information from sensory to working memory (short term) to long term memory stores. One of the first things we need to do to even move information from sensory to working memory is to ATTEND. That is, paying attention to whatever information we come across. Unfortunately, we have to censor and choose what is most relevant to us because we are completely inundated with stimuli ALL DAY, from when we are driving to how we walk through the grocery aisles to running our business. We will ONLY pay attention to what is most necessary to survive or help us out, otherwise, the information is useless to us.

Transferring this data to online biz world means we CANNOT rely on formulas and copy and gimmicks that we see all the time to stand out. Eyes will glaze over and NONE of this information will move past sensory memory because there is too much of ‘the same’ and it becomes repetitive to see the same information every day (cue 'how I retired my hubby' to 'follow these 6 simple steps to earn 10k months', etc).  Once information is in the working memory, it needs 'elaboration rehearsal' (simply put: making information meaningful) to be effectively moved to long term memory stores. Once it is long term memory, the information/stimuli/person will be remembered and able to be accessed when necessary!

Now, here are some important points to translate USING the Information Processing Model of Memory to your business and online self/strategy: 

1) You NEED to access your unique take on what you are doing and share it in your own way to stand out!  I strongly value creativity when I work with my clients because I never want to be doing whatever anyone else is doing (at least as much as possible), and this should be a welcome message to you too. Sometimes we might feel pressure to put ourselves in a box (we think there is only one way we are 'supposed' to do things) when instead, we should gives ourselves PERMISSION to break out! Your biggest asset is the way YOU see the world and how you will contribute to change...in your clients and business and your own life!

2) Even when you don't think people are really listening to you (cue few likes or comments on your posts)...impact might be measured by others knowing who you are and what you are about. Through your posts, they know what type of person you are (and may like you for your values and sentiments) and when they need something, they will come to you! They have REMEMBERED who you are because of repeated exposures from the times you have posted...they have attended because you have shared of yourself on a different and authentic way.

3) What you share MEANS something and to even have someone notice us (moving from sensory to short term memory), we must be sharing of ourselves. If you are someone who is not sure what you should be posting, think about your ideal client(s) and what they need today. What might they be thinking or feeling? What do they need to hear from you? How can YOU help them in your message? Give yourself permission to get out there even if feels uncomfortable or makes you a little uneasy. THIS feeling sometimes means you are doing the right thing...it can feel uncomfortable and that is a good thing!

Overall, I want you to feel as though you CAN and SHOULD be doing what is best for you and your business, from the way you communicate to your services to your copy; it should be unique and 100% you (no need to share gimmicky language or the copy we are tired of).  Please ALLOW yourself to be expressed (without judgment) because this will not only feel good, but you are more likely to stand out from the online crowd...

See more. Be more. You are more. 💛

{THE UNEXPECTED SHARP EDGES}

A holiday comes...a holiday goes. Magic mixed with darkness. A strange holding of two opposing experiences, subtle and strong in their own ways. We love this time of year, and we feel uneasy around this time of year.

The expectation of being happy feels like a burden.

We aren’t sure how we are supposed to feel at this time of year. The lights and ‘merry+joy’ signs and upbeat holiday music and festive stress make us want to get caught up in it all. Except we can’t...sometimes we know why and sometimes there doesn’t seem to be a real reason.

It catches us off guard.

We feel disconnected from the energy of the season. We feel alone and slightly detached from the spirit around us. We watch our surroundings and the people around us moving and talking, but don’t feel immersed in them or uplifted by them.

{YOU ARE OK. IT IS OK.}

We are ALLOWED to be happy + uneasy + sad (even without an identified reason) + grateful + whatever else we think or feel TODAY and throughout the extended holiday season. And, the holiday season is meant to be experienced in your authentic state. And your authentic state does not have to exclude the bad or good feelings...it can hold ALL the feelings.

Friend, come as you are. Be in the moment and holiday season as you need/want to be. Embrace the good + uncomfortable + the warmth that is around you. Be open to the invitation of love from those that care about you.